Do you feel guilty about giving screen time to your kid? Honestly, you will hardly find any parent who has not gone through the same phase. While knowing all the impacts of using a digital device for a longer time, we feel lost when we try to avoid or reduce screen time. Before jumping straight into a solution of elimination or reduction process, can we reflect for a moment on why we have introduced that smart device to our kids?

Extremely powerful device

Let me tell you a fun fact. Different parents have different challenges to handle their kids and surprisingly all these barriers can be solved by this small tiny device (a little bit expensive though). It does not matter whether a kid is angry, sad, bored, depressed, anxious, all these emotions can be converted into pleasure by those smart devices in the blink of an eye.

You are not alone!

We, most of the parents, think it's only my kid who is mischievous, throws tantrums, does not pay attention, does the opposite what is being asked? But you know very well that it's neither your kid nor this generation, kids are like this all the time. Be it you, your siblings, your cousins, or your parents or grandparents, we were also naughty, and did exactly the opposite of what was instructed when we were kids.

Do you think our parents or grandparents had less stuff to work on or they had more leisure time to entertain us? Undoubtedly they were busy too. Then how come we didn't need something magical as today’s smart device.

What is missing?

Actually, we had something more powerful than what today’s kids have. Don’t wrinkle your eyes. We had a playground to play in, we had a pond to swim in, we had storybooks to read, we had friends to express ourselves, we had a bond with nature, we had people’s houses to go for a visit and I am sure you will find a lot more when you dive into your childhood memory.

Let’s see what we have done with our kids. We have replaced regular playing in the playground with video games and an occasional visit to the park, replaced the pond with a swimming pool(which has fixed timing), replaced storybooks with online videos, replaced direct interaction with friends by chats on social media platforms, instead of going to someone’s house we prefer to go shopping mall or restaurants. And these are not the only things, how we are messing up our life as well as lifestyle.

The fundamental causes

No human being likes to be bound by rules and kids are not an exception. The most convenient way, we parents choose to reduce our kid’s screen time is to set some rules, terms, and conditions (for eg. you are allowed to use this, only when you have finished that work). But in this way, will not these devices become more attractive, tempting?

Then how can we eliminate the problem from the root? The simple answer is by reducing its importance. But again, how can we do that?

Kids are expressive, curious, creative, explorers by nature. They need primarily three things to nurture those feelings. Those are:

1. Friends: Nowadays people say you have to be a friend to your kid to be the best parent. Yes, that’s true but even though we try to be their friend there is a constraint. We are not physically active as they are, we are somewhat more mature than them so we become judgmental unknowingly, we are not imaginative as they are and the list will go on.

   

   From our own experience, we can say, we consider someone to be our friend when we feel we both are on the same boat. So, to summarize this, our kid needs some more kids who have similar energy levels, similar thinking zones, and similar excitement to boost his/her curious, adventurous mind.

2. Nature: What can I say about nature? We all have experienced the refreshing, unwinding, relaxed feelings when we are surrendered by nature. The bond with nature is eternal. We built that bond when we walked on mud or grass barefoot, when we climbed up to the tree for fun, when we just sit on the river bank with friends, when we laid down under the open sky, and many more touching moments.

   

   These were so integral to our life that we did not realize how significant role such kind of activities played to grow and mature us both mentally and physically. I am sure no one cannot deny how thrilled and heroic we feel by reviving those cherished moments. Please feel free to share such moments through the comment box.

3. Books: When we were young, our brain was just like a blank canvas. Whenever we read or heard any sort of story, our imaginative minds started flowing with tons of crazy, exciting thoughts/ideas. And we did not stop just generating those ideas, sometimes we put those ideas into implementations. Tiny tiny success moments were real pride for us.

   

   In present days, those classic stories are converted into colorful, eyes glued videos. Kids are happy watching those, so we are. But what we are essentially doing here is snitching their exploratory daring childhood from them.

Solution

Basically, we have partially (if not fully) swapped these essential things with electronic devices. And we all know how efficiently it can fascinate the human brain. So, the only effective way to reduce the use of those gadgets is to bring those crucial things back into kid’s life.

Doing something against our regular habit is very tough because our brain is more comfortable doing something convenient than what is right. Hence breaking the chain would be more difficult if we do it alone. Here are few steps we can get started with. I hope you have already figured out that it is not going to be easy but once it is done you will realize the best possible thing you have done for your kid.

1. Parent hunt: Your kid needs other kids to play with, explore new things together. If your kid is already having a group of friends staying nearby (preferably in the same colony or apartment, so that they can meet whenever they want, they don’t need to depend on parents to see their friends) then your task will be a little easier and don’t need to hunt for parents. Once you have a group of parents, you have to check their willingness to allow their kid to spend at least 1 hour daily playing outside, trying new activities. Our parents were really lucky, they didn’t have all these hurdles for sure.

2. Outside exploration: Can we break one of our favorite habits of going to the shopping mall or restaurants regularly by going to our favorite relative or friend’s house? It is necessary to choose that friend or relative wisely.

   

   There are few criteria I usually keep in mind.

• I like their company
• They have a spacious house where kids can enjoy (maybe a garden or long attractive veranda or well-maintained roof)
• They also have a kid

Sometimes we can not go out for different unavoidable circumstances. In such a situation, they can cultivate a new hobby like painting, singing, playing a musical instrument, dancing, writing etc. It can boost energy levels and bring joy to the mind.

3. Books: If you are a book lover, you already know what a book can bring into your life. Is there any specific book you read in your childhood which you loved the most, which changed the direction of your thinking, which you want other children to experience too? Please feel free to share those books’ names.

You should always encourage your kid to read books from various genres as well as allow them to talk about their feelings/thoughts after reading any books. It is a good practice to share the storybooks with friends/cousins. This way they will increase the bonding between them.

P.S. By this article I am not stating to stay away or get rid of the digital platform. This is one of the greatest inventions in our mankind and even you would not have read my post without it. Just like all other human creations, it also needs to be used cautiously to get all its benefits.